Tom Murphy

Tom Murphy, aka WaterKeeper, was born in Manhattan just after Peter Minuit, a real estate agent working for Donald Trump, purchased the island. Shorty thereafter, he went to Salem, Massachusetts to study alchemy under the auspices of several fine ladies.

During the French and Indian War he was the first to figure out that smoke signals were actually a binomial code that might have other uses. At the Boston Tea Party he asked if the rebels had filed an environmental impact statement.

In the First World War he realized that Clorox could be used as a weapon of mass destruction and, in the second World War, he told Franklin that the atom could be split with a good set of Chicago cutlery, which changed the course of the war. Moving on to VietNam he noticed a lot of weeds in the local’s gardens and developed a great new weed killer known as "Agent Orange." He also was instrumental in coating technology for America's Vanguard project in the late 50's. This had him deported to Connecticut where he became interested in saltwater watching Lloyd Bridges in Seahunt. Later, he was really hooked when the Aquanauts premiered.

With the downturn in aerospace, and the lack of an economic recovery package, he moved on to environmental concerns, notibly working for the water and wastewater industries for many years. With an unlimited supply of RO/DI he decided to venture into reefkeeping with much success. He therefore joined Reef Central, where he is a much hated moderator.

He is now confined in a mental institution in Ohio where he is serving out a 35-year to life sentence for newbie harassment.